i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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