Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize
