i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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