What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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