Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
