I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Randomize
