Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
We have so much sex to catch up on
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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