Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize