I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
