so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
