I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
