alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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