1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize