Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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