so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
