garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I want to make a zoo with you.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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