Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
