yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
