Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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