He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize