fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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