My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
