how can u be prego again
I could make wine with my vomit
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
