You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
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