id be glad to
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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