I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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