Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
