They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Hippo gnu deer
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
