Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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