The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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