jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
