dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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