Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize