Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
