Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
