Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize