the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
