i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
