so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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