She's JV to your varsity
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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