i barfeds in our rink
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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