Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
