My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize
