Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
