I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
