im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
