Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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