Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
