would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
