how hairy? two words: wookie tits
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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