Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
